Jaded Road to Acceptance
by The Great Ying
Summary: Shortly after the events of Oogway banishing Kai to the Spirit Realm, Oogway is struggling to accept his past self and immoral deeds and is haunted by his vanquished brother in arms. One-shot.


**''Mastery of Chi requires mastery of self. Oogway sat alone in a cave for thirty years asking one question... Who am I?''**

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China had just emerged from a period of darkness. The darkness of war was now receding from the land. But for what seemed like an exit from such chaotic times for the people of China, another was only entering the fray; the guilt of darkness weighed on him. He was responsible for many acts of violence – acts of war. But now, he was a long ways away from the crimson-stained battlefields and fighting the banners of armies. He seethed with regret and guilt. He was now someone who sought an inner peace as a result of his past actions, and to contemplate on the reflection of himself.

Under a nearby mountain was a cave. At the mouth of the cave sat a lone figure, whose mind was that of the outside weather; stormy and unclear. Water trickled down the walls as a gusty wind blew past him. His shawl was thrown up a little, and he twitched. Concentration was something he hadn't gotten yet, despite what the panda elders had taught him. Drops of water dripped down from a group of stalactites, which bounced off his head. He gently opened his eyes and stared outside of the grotto, slightly annoyed that he had not been able to induce himself into a proper meditative state. Too many thoughts raced through his mind, thoughts of the future, and thoughts of the past. Especially thoughts of the past…

He sighed, and readjusted himself so the droplets of water would not pierce his concentration. Staring into a pool of water, more droplets descended from the roof of the cave and nearly missed his head, and upon hitting the pool they sent ripples outwards. Placing his claws upon his lap, he gently closed his eyes and took deep breaths. The words of his former master echoed through his mind.

''There is no past, there is no future, there is only now...''

Those words echoed through the shroud of darkness that covered Oogway's mind and vision. For a while, the only thing he could see was the veil of black. He thought he had embraced the words of his master. But the temporary peace was abruptly pierced by shrill, blood curdling screams that echoed throughout the mindscape of the tortoise.

It suddenly felt like he was falling. Falling down into a dark pit of immorality. Every thought of his past became interred within him. He kept falling, and falling, and falling... Until he reached the very bottom of his thoughts. He could see himself standing up very slowly. He gripped the staff that had been his spear and pushed off the floor of darkness with his claw. In front of him was a dark cave that seemed to call to him. Calling to the darkness of his past self. A certain energy filled the air and the storm clouds that brewed above, one that was all too familiar and sinister for his liking.

''Enter, Oogway...''

He hesitantly did. He went into the cave, not knowing what to expect specifically but knowing only that he would encounter the darkness that he had hesitated to confront. The mouth of the cave was only the entrance to a long corridor that seemed to have no end.

He walked further into the cave, and heard more of the screams, but this time with the sound of clashing weapons and sinister laughing. A light green mist filled the cave, and he immediately became on-edge. The energy. The voice... It was all too familiar, and something he longed to leave in his past.

''You haven't forgotten about me, have you?'' The mist swirled around to see Oogway's face. It took on the shape of a scarred and disfigured Kai.

''No Kai, but I'm trying to...'' Oogway said.

''You think you can simply forget about me? You're hilarious Oogway! I am forever a part of you. Your guilt will always weigh on you for banishing me to the Spirit Realm...'' Kai chuckled as Oogway trudged along the path of the corridor.

''Your abuse of the power of Chi was something I could not ignore. What I did was to protect you, and for the greater good of the citizens of China. I am sorry, Kai.''

Kai's face became twisted. He had become displeased with this new Oogway. What had happened to the former shell of his brother?

''Greater good? Protection? Ha! You have become soft. Do you know what we could've done with the power of Chi? We could've been the only wielders of such power by killing the pandas! Conquer the east and become the ultimate warlords!''

Oogway kept walking, but once more picked up his pace.

''I-I am no longer such a monster.''

Kai swirled around, growing more displeased than before.

''Monster? Oh, I'm the monster now brother? But you readily place yourself above me and wish to become an old reverend sage who sits on some holy ground loved by all, only to become asinine with a moral code.''

''No, that's not it...'' Kai chuckled, with Oogway picking up his pace.

''Oh yes, that _is_ it Oogway. You wish to become like your master. Your master that I slaughtered in my name. _Your name._ You betrayed him and everybody else. But most of all,_ you betrayed me!''_

The floor, ceiling and walls of the cave disappeared. In its place was the black veil of the mindscape filled by a green mist, with Oogway viewing himself from his vision. The viridian haze took a form once more, and again it was Kai.

''Everything I ever did was to protect you Oogway! But instead you side with a bunch of pathetic elders for their ways of healing with Chi!''

Kai's entire silhouette filled the sky, with the green mist surrounding it like an aura, once more giving off the sinister ambiance.

''Stop this! Get out of my head!''

A golden mist began to seep out of Oogway, but it was quickly overwhelmed by the powerful mist of Kai.

''Do you feel that Oogway? _That _is the power of Chi! The power to take it from others is an incredible gift that you did not use and punished me for!''

Oogway readied himself into a battle stance, once more prepared to take on the manifestation of his brother. But he did not know if he could take him here like he could in the Mortal Realm.

''I feel your self-doubt Oogway. Give into it! You were never meant to be wise – only a warlord who craves power!''

Images flashed across Oogway's mind, and he could see himself sieging strongholds with Kai, and killing innocents in the process with no care in the world. It was a part of his past and himself that he was not willing to accept - _yet._

Oogway ran at the manifestation of Kai, and in the process, he launched himself through the air by using the pole of his defunct spear.

''_You are not a part of me, You are not me, And that is not me_!''

Kai laughed vigorously, as Oogway was about to plunge his spear into the figure.

''Oh, but it is...''

Oogway suddenly saw the reflection of himself as a warlord, the dark red eyes of his past self staring into him. He crashed against the reflective surface that blocked him from Kai, and he started to fall toward the floor of his mind as the ceaseless laughing of his brother was heard.

Before he reached the ground, he opened his eyes and jolted himself out of his meditative state. His heart was beating fast, and he quickly took a reality check. He swerved his head to make sure he was really there. Once he was sure of this, he sighed with grief. He stared at the reflective pool of water once more and saw something familiar - a golden yellow energy had been illuminating from his claws, but it was now dimming down and disappearing.

He had a long journey ahead of him if he was to ever accept himself.

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**A/N**

A one-shot showing the psychological and spiritual aftermath of banishing Kai to the Spirit Realm, and how it's effecting Oogway on his journey to Inner Peace. Tried to keep it ambiguous, as any fan knows the timeline is quite.. screwy. You can interpret this as either Oogway having already gained Inner Peace and is now trying to fully master it, or is sitting in a cave for 30 years before he goes and creates Kung Fu (Was especially confused so that's kinda why.) Anyways, I'm a huge fan of Oogway and Kai and especially have a love for the warlord period of the KFP universe. Considering there's a lack of Oogway and Kai content out there I thought I'd fill the void, and writing this one-shot was a way of doing so and also quite fun! Also consider this an out of order prelude to a story that's in the works. Hope you enjoyed!


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